Because I Said So…

The Boston Tea Party has disbanded after approximately two years and Tom Knapp, founder of the party, resigned from its national committee via the BTP Yahoo message board.  

In his resignation, Knapp insisted the national committee members remained unresponsive to efforts to schedule the BTP national convention.  He wrote, “Aside from an allegedly active New York affiliate, it is my opinion that the Boston Tea Party has ceased to exist as a going concern, and that there is no substantial likelihood of its revival.”

I don’t think Knapp and crew tried everything they could to hold the party together.  Did the BTP try offering free coffee to members to stimulate its efforts?  Read the message in it’s entirety after the jump. Continue Reading »

Presidential candidate Alan Keyes might be leaving the GOP.  In a conference call with supporters last week, Keyes apparently said staying in the Republican Party would be “an occasion of sin” and he is ready to bolt.

Keyes really dislikes John McCain, in addition to every other candidate, so the Bizzaro World Obama wants no part in selecting the “type of deodorant we need to make a stinking candidate acceptable to conservatives.” A Keyes supporter who took part in the conference call confirmed to Radar that the former Reagan administration official said, “he could no longer remain in the Republican Party.”

But never fear.  The Keyes campaign will not die.  He hinted in January that he might go for a third party bid and an e-mail sent out by the campaign after the call includes a link for supporters who “want to vote for Alan as your 1st, 2nd and 3rd choice on the Constitution Party presidential poll.”

A Keyes message board commenter who claims to have been on the conference call last night said regarding the possibility of a Constitution Party run that, “Alan asked us to pray about it. That’s what he is doing as he is considering these things. He did not say he’s definately [sic] going to do it, but from the tone of things I am going to say it’s very likely.”

Lucky for Keyes, I have the Pope on speed dial.  Well, actually that’s Chili’s, but while I’m waiting for the Pope to get back to me I can put in an order for an Awesome Blossom.  I can’t say it enough:  God bless America.

Looks like Ron Paul’s presidential campaign is ending now that the GOP has spoken and wants 100-year-war McCain as its leader.  To continue beyond this point would be ludicrous, and we all know Paul has run a sensible campaign until this point.

Jesse Benton, Paul campaign’s communication manager, said Friday that the Texas congressman is ending his run for the White House:  “We are acknowledging that Ron will not be the nominee and that we are winding down the campaign.”   

Paul already hinted the end was near in a video to supporters posted on YouTube on Thursday:

Oh, Paul.  Though you will never be the U.S. president–unless it blew up and you were sole survivor and even then you’d have some competition with Michael Jackson’s former pet Ben–you will always be the president of our Internets.  The obscure politician with fringe politics used the Web to raise a staggering $30 million dollars.  At one point, Ron Paul’s YouTube videos accounted for five of the top 10 candidate videos, with the largest overall viewership of any candidate.  So, farewell Mr. Internet.  Hail, to the chief. 

Presidential hopeful Mike Gravel isn’t interested in getting votes during his campaign.  Instead, the 77-year-old former Alaska Senator wants his idea to save the country to get some recognition.

The plan is called the National Initiative and involves passing a constitutional amendment that would move the U.S. from a representative democracy to a direct democracy by having all laws voted on in federal ballot initiatives.  Apparently Gravel is thrilled that his candidacy for the Democratic nomination is giving his ideas a wider reach.

Another plus?  He is bigger than J-Lo.  “The day I filed for office I got more attention on the initiative than I had in 15 years,” Gravel told me. “I was getting off a plane and Jennifer Lopez was getting her bags — I didn’t recognize her, someone told me — and no one came up to her, but three people came up and pumped my hand,” Gravel told Time reporter Joel Stein. 

But the Christmas light-bulb sized spotlight might be making Gravel a bit conceited.  During a speech at Harvard, Gravel told a crimson crowd that he had more charisma than front-runner challenger Barack Obama.  That’s like the Beatles saying they’re bigger than Jesus.  You just don’t do it unless you’ve been officially declared insane or you are God.

Moreover, the little attention Gravel procured has made him more paranoid than usual.  He fears he’s such a threat to the military industry complex that he wants to dismantle a sign that says his campaign headquarters in Virginia is on the third floor of a building. 

Poor Grandpa Gravel even thinks teachers are after him: 

The ex-Alaska Senator’s campaign got a blip of national attention over a surreal campaign YouTube video in which he stares at the camera, throws a rock in the water and walks away. “Two young teachers said I’d like to shoot a video. I said, ‘What do they want me to do?’ They said, ‘Throw a rock in the water.’ I said, ‘Great. I’ll give them an hour.’ So I look in the camera for a full minute and all I can think is I look dumb as s–t,” Gravel says.

Regardless, Gravel plans to stick with the campaign through November.  He even said he’d consider running on the Libertarian Party ticket or as a member of another third party.  What an attention whore.